A lot of people will tell you to "stop taking it so personally," which is a pretty dismissive cop-out that minimizes how you feel. They mean well, but telling someone who's unhappy to just "be happy" isn't going to do any good. That said, attitude does count for a lot, and sometimes a good mood will give you the clarity of mind needed to handle criticism better.
In some cases, that just means you need a dose of self-confidence, or a chance to do the things you're good at. When you know criticism is coming, do something you know you do well, and enjoy that feeling. Talk to someone who supports you, and can honestly tell you why you're good at what you do. Keep a work diary or a journal of awesomeness to remember why you rock, and then dive into the criticism, knowing that whatever you hear will only be fodder to help you rock harder.
You can do it! Criticism is hard to take, but it's essential for all of us. Do you have any more tips for Why Bother that can help him stop worrying and be awesome instead? Share them with us in the comments below. Have a question or suggestion for Ask Lifehacker? Title photo by Nic McPhee. There's a Very Good Reason why it can be difficult to accept criticism without taking it personally. Let's look at the first two definitions of criticism at dictionary. Criticism will not kill you.
The mere possibility of being criticized can fill you with dread. Giving criticism can be as hard as receiving it. Not all criticism is created equal. In my own situation, I chose to address the genuine concern and discard the rest.
Criticism can fuel your personal growth. But once the defenses drop, allow this question to come to the surface: Is there any truth to the criticism? Entertaining this question will be the starting point of your personal growth. Kick Your Fear of Criticism to the Curb As long as you are breathing, leading, or doing something that matters, you will be criticized.
Instead of trying to avoid it at all costs, expect it—even welcome it. Web More Posts. See a typo or inaccuracy? Please contact us so we can fix it! Did you enjoy this post? Please share the wisdom :. Free Download: Buddha Desktop Wallpaper. David's response was quick and cutting: "You know, you're the kind of manager the rest of us hate. None of us enjoy getting criticized. It's human nature to enjoy being right and feel a sense of hurt when we're wrong. The thing is, we all need criticism.
Although we're generally drawn to like-minded people, those who disagree with us truly help us grow. The ones who call us out, point out our weaknesses and flaws. Emotional intelligence involves the ability to recognize and understand your emotions, and to use that information to guide decision making.
There are times when you shouldn't listen to criticism--for example, when it's based on falsehood or given in a way that's meant to destroy your sense of self-worth. But in reality, that's not usually the case.
And although I encourage delivering criticism in a way that's constructive and helpful I've come a long way since that first management position , these points are important when we're giving criticism. When we're on the receiving end of criticism, our goal should be to learn from the feedback, and not let emotion close our minds. The key is to be proactive, not reactive. Contact the members of this personal board of directors , share how the negative comments affected you, and seek their perspective and advice.
You may find it hard to sleep or eat well. During these times, carve out more time for yourself. Identify two to three small rituals or practices that help renew your energy. Bonus points if you then send that person a note expressing your gratitude. To move forward as a successful executive, I had to develop a stomach for criticism — even if it meant a bruised ego.
In the end, I talked to the people in my organization and acknowledged their various opinions. Then I clearly stated what the plan would be going forward and told the group that I hoped they would join me in working wholeheartedly toward the goals I had presented. Most of them did. Over time, I increased my resilience by following the steps above. You have 1 free article s left this month. You are reading your last free article for this month.
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